Healing

Whether it be a loss due to death, a heartbreak from a relationship, losing a job etc – bouncing back can often be hard. I’m not speaking on behalf of others this is an account of my own personal feelings. So often we tend to keep things bottled up and try and resolve things on our own or attempt to give our-self closure. Now nothing is wrong with that and there’s also nothing wrong with being able to rely on yourself. But what I will say is that it can be difficult when you try to self-heal and forget the support you have of others. When you feel as though you’re a burden to people so you keep things to yourself. Growing up as the eldest I’ve always been the one to not do this or that, to play by the rules, to keep it together and never falter, to always put others needs before my own.

Just recently I discovered I suffer from minor anxiety but even that you still brush it away thinking girl just breathe how is that hard? Only recently have I been through a fair share of trials and trust me this healing thing isn’t always easy. I’ve damn near watched every oprah, dr phil, Ted talks, church sermons you name it lol. They really do help at times but I’ve come to learn that your emotions and feelings are only a result of your mind. You can distract yourself with as many hobbies, Netflix shows, hangouts but it’s when you’re alone with just your thoughts that you become most vulnerable.

One of my favourite lyric line is “emancipate yourself from mental slavery none but ourselves can free our mind.” I find this so relatable, I myself can be my hardest critique. I don’t know the answers on how to heal or how to move forward in the best way possible. But I do know that with a strong support system whether it be friends and family or God it makes the journey bearable. One of the most important things I’ve tried to apply in my healing process is never to be bitter towards a person or situation. Is it hard yes but again I try not use my energy to harbour hate. Every experience is a lesson- I look at them like a hammer. You use it to either build yourself or to break yourself. Depending on your attitude and your forward vision will determine which path you go on. Now I don’t write this to get pity or for people to all of a sudden think my life is a sob story. I write this in hope that maybe someone else will feel comfort in knowing that just like them we all have struggles. I write this to let them know that also just like them it is taking quite some time to heal but it’s OKAY.

I’d also like to use this article to thank everyone who has crossed paths with me- friends who check in on me without even knowing that their kind thought has helped get me through a rough day. People who have walked passed and simply just smiled and asked me how my day is – never underestimate the power of R U OK? I used to roll my eyes at the concept but the strength behind it is priceless. Also to the people around me who never fail to make me laugh, laughter really is the best medicine as corny as that sounds. Anywho whether your religious or not I believe everyone has a plan set out for them – it’s all a matter of trusting the process. This year my goal is to trust in what is and what will be. I also want to grow my gratitude towards life and how blessed I am to live a life that I may complain about yet someone else may long for. I look forward to this New Year and I can’t wait to see what it has install for me . To anyone going through anything whether it be big or small I pray that you find peace and hope you find joy in your journey.

-All my love Win